Thursday, May 15, 2008

Confession

I feel ripped off. By this Saturday at noon I will be a college graduate. It has taken four years for me to realize what that means. It means that I am more educated than 98% of the world. It means that I have enough debt to keep me and my future family in the the same system. It means that I am bound by privilege.

Here at Taylor I have been given a very good, Christ-centered education. My practicum for a degree in Christian Educational Ministries took me to Juarez, Mexico where I facilitated high school mission trips in basically a squatter colony. There I learned what it looked like to not have enough resources to feed your baby properly, and to watch across a fence as another bank building goes up, waving Old Glory. As those people shared Christ and many gifts with me, I felt like I learned much more about the reality of God during my first few weeks there then I did as I was writing research papers at length for my Bible or Christian Ed classes.

My frustration is not against Taylor, but that I feel trapped. It takes a lot of effort to break myself of consuming, wasting, entitlement, and just plain ignorance. Oversimplified but not nearly as expressive as it is within me it is this that I am frustrated at: It cost me over $100,000 to realize that I don't want this kind of life-- and I have to retain my privileged place in society just to pay (a good portion) of it back.

I hope that I can find someone who can show me what it truly means to become like Christ.
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1 comment:

dauthan said...

Ugh, yeah that's not fun to think about. Several thoughts:
1. These things have a way of working themselves out if you stay within God's will for your life as best as you can.
2. You know this, but you'll need someone*s* to help you be more like Jesus. And the best one is the man himself.